Transformers: Chaos Theory (pt 1)

This review was fast lane commissioned by @Vinegrape


We've done sprawling multimedia franchises in this project, and we've done American toy commercials in it, but now we're going balls to the walls and looking at a sprawling multimedia American toy commercial franchise! And no, I don't have the words in the wrong order there; I'm pretty sure that the actual toys stopped being the Transformers' main profit source decades ago. Probably even before the Michael Bay movies happened.

I saw a little bit of Transformers media growing up, mostly at friends' houses (like I've mentioned before, my parents were very restrictive with what we got to watch on TV, so while I was aware of most of the 90's toons I didn't get to see many of them). Like most of you, I know that the main characters are all cybertronians; a species of enormous robotic beings that can reconfigure themselves between humanoid and other (usually vehicular) shapes. That's where the "transformer" name comes from, and the special gimmick of the original Hasbro toys this was originally made to sell should be pretty self-evident. The plot and worldbuilding got a lot more complicated over time, but it mostly revolves around two factions - the heroic autobots led by Optimus Prime, and the evil decepticons led by Megatron - fighting each other over sacred cybertronian artifacts that are sometimes implied to be related to their mysterious creators. Sometimes these battles take place on Earth, either modern or prehistoric (I believe the official line is that they colonized earth in prehuman times, fought over it, but then got frozen or something for a few eons until human explorers or global warming or something awakened them). Sometimes they fight in space, or on Cybertron, or other worlds as well, without any human characters in sight. Like I said, it's a big franchise.

This particular story was written long after my childhood exposure to the franchise, spanning two issues of the IDW Publishing transformers comics that ran from 2009-2011. As such, I know nothing about it, or even about the material leading up to it (this commission includes issues #22-23 of the IDW run). So, to provide context, @Vinegrape provided me with a small amount of background information and lore going in. I'll make it clear when I'm drawing from that background within the review.

They also said that the IDW comic run had much less corporate oversight than usual, which meant the writers were free to explore scifi concepts and political topics that Hasbro normally wouldn't encourage in a child-targeted franchise. So, this might actually be good. We'll see!

The Transformers #22​

Open on a cybertronian café, some time before the Autobot versus Decepticon war, where a pair of working class transformers are chatting over trashcan-sized cups of red hot molten iron.

I want to know what the hell those cups are even made out of. ​

I have to say, this depiction of Cybertron is disappointing to me, especially in light of what I was told about this comic exploring high concept scifi when the suits weren't looking. A form of life as alien as this, and their cities are designed exactly like ours? Their cafés are designed exactly like ours? I'm especially disappointed by the concept of a race of beings who can reshape themselves into trucks, airplanes, and even spaceships having vehicles of their own parked along the sidewalk outside. Especially such generic-looking vehicles that don't look like anything the transformers couldn't match on their own.

The articulated metal sidewalk is kinda cool, I guess. But overall, this is a disappointing visual.

It turns out that transformer Karl Marx over on the left side of the table is none other than Megatron. The leader of the decepticons, and cackling megalomaniacal villain of the franchise. Apparently this is his origin story.

...

This could easily go in a really cringey direction. It might not, but there's definitely a pattern that this looks like it might be about to follow.

...

Megatron's café friend - Impactor! That was his name! - tells him that while he agrees with Megatron's diagnosis of what's wrong with their society, he thinks his solution is nonsense. Nonviolent direct action? Why bother with that when they could just raise an army of their fellow miners and coup the government? Megatron insists that attempting a violent revolution won't lead to anything good, that normalization of more egalitarian ideas and courting powerful political actors will lead to a far more stable paradigm shift. Impactor just scoffs that he'll try to remember that the next time he's being beaten up by a supervisor.

Yeeeesh. Sounds like Cybertron is at around a nineteenth century-ish place with regards to labour. Either that, or a literal slave state, though the type of political action Megatron is proposing makes it seem more like the former.

In the background, a small red transformer by the name of Rung has accidentally spilled some off-duty soldiers' jug of magma, and is about to get beat up for it. Sucks to be Rung. By extension, sucks to be a member of the nonmilitary working class.

Back in the foreground, Impactor tells Megatron that of course a violent revolution won't change the exploitative, hierarchical nature of society. However, he also believes that NOTHING will change the exploitative, hierarchical nature of society. Domination and hierarchy is fundamental to life itself, whether its two people in a room or an interstellar civilization of billions. Sure, he hates the current elites as much as Megatron does, but he'd rather just replace them with their own group at the top of the pyramid than futilely try to flatten it out.

...Impactor is giving me strong NazBol vibes. Am I actually reading about a Strasserite transformer? That's a sentence I never expected to type.

As they talk, Rung gets thrown across the café and lands on their table. Impactor immediately gets up and says he's going to go deal with those soldiers. Megatron asks him how the hell he intends to diffuse the situation, and Impactor just says that he wants to get some engine oil on his fists.

So, Megatron was the violence-averse reformist, at one point. I guess that he eventually starts seeing things Impactor's way and goes red fash? Or maybe something else, I don't know. I really don't recall the Decepticons having an ideology beyond being the bad guys, but that was the nineties and this is the 2010's. Are we actually getting nazbol decepticons in this comic?

If so, part of me wishes they were just Marxist-Leninists instead. Just think of all the tankie jokes.

Jump ahead to the "present day." I'm not sure when the "present" is, exactly, since the autobots and decepticons have been fighting for longer than Homo sapiens has existed and there have been Transformers stories set anywhere from before the last glacial maximum to the 24th century. So, sometime in between those two I guess, good luck narrowing it down. We're in an autobot facility (or perhaps aboard a spaceship), and they have Megatron in captivity. The commissioner told me that the last thing that happened in the comic before this issue was Megatron suddenly approaching the autobots, alone, and turning himself in without explanation. If you've been exposed to any Transformers media at all, you'll know that this is very, very unlike Megatron. Even as part of a plot or ploy, this isn't something his ego would permit. So, either this comic has a very, very different interpretation of the character, or there's something really extraordinary going on.

Naturally, the autobots are taking security very, very seriously. This is the enemy leader they need to keep imprisoned, after all, and him turning himself in without explanation is...unsettling, to say the least. Some of the autobot technicians want to cut Megatron's CPU out of his body and secure him that way, though they're quickly reminded that that would constitute mistreatment of POW's if not outright torture. I guess the transformers have more of a concept of bodily autonomy than I'd expect, given their modular, customizable frames.

Watching the prison cell, autobot leader Optimus Prime notes that while Megatron has rebuilt his body into something much larger and more intimidating than his previous design, he's left his face unchanged. Even though that seems like it should be a weak point compared to the rest of his new, armored hull.

Like I said, Megatron has an ego. That's what makes the act of surrendering so surprising, coming from him.

The other autobots are exchanging legends about the fearsome Megatron. Including something very implausible sounding about him having a pact with an eldritch black hole demon that lets him summon antimatter ex nihilo, which most of the others laugh at. I'm guessing this is a meta joke about some particularly bizarre thing from earlier in the Transformers publishing history. Other autobots are just amazed to see him up close, let alone holding still and not shooting at them.

Anyway, Optimus Prime decides he's got to go in and try to have a private chat with Megatron. If he'll talk to anyone among the autobots, he'll talk to his personal nemesis Optimus. Though they've fought for literal aeons, they've also developed something of an understanding. Furthermore...Optimus has sensed a subtle change in Megatron's behavior, in recent encounters.

Interesting. Either Megatron is no longer that bombastic SatAm villain he's been for most of his life, or he was only ever just playing that character as a kind of demagoguery for the decepticons, and he's finally getting tired of it.

...

To be clear; the Megatron I saw in a few TV episodes and I think one movie really was just a bog-standard SatAm villain. With the political backdrop that this comic has given so far though, it's clear that they're trying to turn these characters into something a bit more than just the shallow cliches most of them were back in the 90's.

...

I'm not sure what Optimus means by Megatron having been his "greatest failure." I guess they had some kind of history prior to being enemy generals? I don't remember if I saw anything about that in my childhood, but it's a common enough setup in American comics and cartoons that the odds would have been good even without this hint. I guess we'll learn more shortly.

Flash back to young Megatron in his much less impressive original labourer-model frame, after Impactor has dragged him into a fight with those soldiers in the café. Unfortunately for both of them, they won. Megatron is in a filthy, graffiti-covered holding cell at a police station, being interrogated by a truly miserable excuse for an officer.

Apparently they had apartheid laws based on construction techniques used to create people until very recently, and the cops are still unofficially enforcing them.

...

Hmmmmm okayyy, this is starting to really annoy me. Literally just a 20th century anglophone liberal state? Guys, you don't need to be this on-the-nose to do social commentary, you know that right? Just look at some of the side stories in K6BD.

We've got a society of giant, shapeshifting alien robots, and it's just a copypaste of America/Canada/etc all the way down to café booths, wage labor, and bastard cops trying to keep minorities from exercising their right to an attorney? What a wasted opportunity for creativity.

...

Impactor is in the hospital. The two military cadets they beat up are in intensive care. I guess what they call a hospital would look more like a workshop to us, but fair enough. If it turns out that they can't get those two army thugs to reboot, then Megatron and Impactor will be in for murder instead of just aggravated assault.

Before Megatron can ask anything else about his, a much scarier looking policebot comes in and relieves the dorky one who'd been interrogating Megatron thus far.

This doesn't look good for babby Megatron.

Back to the present, with Megatron locked in a different jail cell. Optimus Prime leans against the outside of the door, looking exhausted before the interview has even begun. Finally, he tells his underlings to turn off the microphones and close the windows so that he can give Megatron an earnest promise of secrecy, and heads inside.

The scaffold that Megatron is being restrained in makes him look bigger, of course, but even without that it's clear that Megatron has really overengineered himself over the course of his career. Outright towering over Optimus.

Optimus asks him if he's ready to have a serious conversation this time, or if he just wants to do more cartoonish posturing for the sake of the non-existent cameras. Megatron says that he'd like to talk, but doesn't feel like he's really at liberty to speak his mind while hooked up to a paralyzing harness with a killswitch built into it. So, Optimus releases him from his restraints, and asks him to take a seat.

With no eyes or ears on them, Optimus is putting himself at risk with this show of trust. Or maybe not. He and Megatron have duelled before, so clearly the size difference isn't enough to make it one sided.

Megatron asks about the fate of the decepticons he last saw on Earth in some previous story arc of this comic, but Optimus brushes the question off. Probably the best choice; if Megatron ends up escaping or something, it's best if he has as little information as possible. Optimus then tells him that he wants to have a proper conversation. Trying to kill each other has just gotten them an eternal stalemate, so maybe it's time they tried to reach some sort of agreement, and in order to do that they'll need to make sure they understand what each other really wants out of the conflict. In response to this, Megatron just goes on a bizarre, non sequitur rant about how he supposes he's been too busy killing and destroying things and then cleaning the transmission fluid off his fists to have really thought about anything that philosophical in a while. Optimus asks him if he can say even a single sentence that isn't just an expression of hate, and this finally gets him to open up a little.

That's...not helpful, exactly, but it's more earnest communication than Optimus is used to getting from him, so maybe a good sign of things to come.

Also, he describes his captor in that previous cell as "an autobot." The way he's saying it, he's implying that it might have been Optimus himself. I don't recall anything about the autobots having been an old entrenched authority that the decepticons are rebels against, but if they are...well...given what we've been shown about the status quo before the war...okay, unfortunate pattern seems like it might be coming back again, but I'll give this comic the benefit of the doubt for now.

Optimus takes a moment to answer Megatron's last question there. He starts to say yes, then changes it to no, then reconsiders yet again. His feelings about Megatron, he finally says, are too complicated to simply label as "hate." He also says that while Megatron might be sustained by hatred, Optimus finds himself diminished by it.

...erm. Optimus. What you basically just said there is an admission that you DO hate Megatron, but that you think hatred is yucky and don't like to call it what it is. That entire second part serves no purpose besides being a cowardly, self-righteous admission of that.

Looks like Megatron agrees with me. He's been collected and deliberate with his words until now, but this answer makes him lose it and scream out his frustrated with Optimus' sanctimony and pretention. It's honestly pretty hard not to take Megatron's side in this little interaction. Megatron asks Optimus if it gets tiring, constantly putting on this facade of perfection and moral certitude when both of them know damned well what a flawed, uncertain being he really is. Optimus tells Megatron that he doesn't know him. Megatron replies that no, actually, he really, really does know him.

Optimus tells him that if he's losing it, it's only because his life has been so very maddening, and much of that is on the decepticons' shoulders. In the following monologue, Optimus tells us how bleak the cybertronians' world really is when you take all the endless sequels and unchanging status quo seriously and think about the implications.

There is a galactic community out there, and it once held the cybertronians in relatively high regard. Now, it sees them as little more than shiny multiform orcs. For literal eons now, they've fought and fought and fought among their own kind. The civilization that once was - however brutal and tyrannical it might have been - is dust, and has been dust for so long that entire sapient species have evolved, gotten into space, and fallen again. It has been a geologic age since anyone has known their kind as anything but bands of marauders endlessly fighting one another and ruining any planet that happens to get in the way.

Megatron counters that that might be changing. The war has been picking up pace. Back in the day, both sides would spend centuries planning their next battle, while the engagements themselves only lasted a few hours. Now, the rate of battles is starting to almost approach that of wars among non-immortal species. It'll be over soon. And, if the decepticons win, it will all have been worth it in Megatron's estimation.

So, naturally, Optimus asks him how that is. What IS he fighting for, besides sheer spite at this point? What vision do the decepticons even have, that they've been willing to destroy every apparent way of making things better in order to realize? Optimus bids him to imagine that the autobots have unconditionally surrendered, Optimus himself is dead, and the decepticons have free reign over the ruins of Cybertron and the surrounding region of space that the rest of the galactic community labels "HERE THERE BE CARMAGGEDON" on their star charts. What does he do now? What can he even imagine trying to build or create with such a hateful, destruction-obsessed mind and similarly disposed followers?

The answer? An egalitarian, collective society, under which the synthetic master race rules all the puny organics in their territory with a literal iron fist, and that protects itself from the threat of internal dissent with a thriving car-compaction industry.

Oh my god I was right the decepticons are actually nazbols. Dugandroids. Strasserobots. Nazicommies in disguise.

...Optimus' next question should be how many holes Megatron thinks there are.

Optimus tries to find some common ground between what he believes in and what Megatron believes in, but it's a stretch. One that Megatron doesn't buy either.

Well. That's a good question. Where was Optimus Prime when that was going on? I don't really know how to assess this until that question's been answered.

Which, with continuing flashbacks to the time when Megatron was a naïve, idealistic young labour activist, might be coming soon. I really do want to know.


So far, while Megatron is obviously the bad guy and fighting for a repugnant ideology, I find him less unlikeable than Optimus on a personal level. Their meeting starts with Optimus hoping that Megatron is finally going to drop the performance art and have an actual conversation, but Optimus himself doesn't seem willing to do that even after Megatron has. There's also a lot more questions about how this war really started and the two factions came to be that...well, my opinions about both characters and about the comic itself will depend heavily on their answers.

For now, this is a decent stopping point. Halfway through the first issue, so there will probably be four Transformers posts in total.