Fate/Zero S1E6: “Night of Schemes”

That's pretty much every night, if you live in Fateworld. The days are pretty scheme-y, too. And don't even get me started on the mornings and evenings. The first dastardly plot of this particular night, it so happens, is to engage in some sickeningly cute lesbian drag-racing.

I'm not sure which of them is more impressed by the vehicle's speed. It seems like Iri is demonstrating for Arturia, but with Iri's sheltered life and Arturia's bullshit datadump who knows which is actually the least unfamiliar with cars.

Ah, it's actually explained in just a moment! Gray got Iri a muscle car not long after their wedding, and one of her favorite hobbies since then has been driving it around the Land of Always Winter, so she's become a fairly good driver. Albeit, not one familiar with traffic laws. Or other vehicles. Okay, yeah, this might have been a bad idea, but it's cute and they've just been through a lot so whatever.

Suddenly, Arturia tells Iri to hit the brakes. She does so, and they skid to a halt just a few meters ahead of a robed figure who was clearly blocking them. Would Iri have not seen that man standing in front of them if Arturia hadn't been paying attention? Yeah, this was a bad idea, no caveats now, lol. Also, it turns out that the person standing in front of them is Bluebeard, who I guess has really wasted no time in coming for his waifu. With the notable exception of Gray, seemingly everyone who's met Arturia wants to lance her a lot. Roll intro.

You know, my favorite part of the OP is just the very first few chords, with that little jingling sound and the deceptively serene moonlight under the Fuyuki City bridge. It's really pretty, though it also makes it seem like it's going to be some fluffy shojo anime, which...well, come to think of it, the best parts of this show so far are when it IS being a fluffy shojo anime, so I guess that's only fitting.

When we come back, Arturia and Iri get out, and Bluebeard bows and gives an opening line worthy of Mikiya:

"Virgin," eh? That crystal ball of his must have missed some recent events, because she's had so many haemonculus fingers in her by now that you can just call her Mustang.

Iri asks Arturia if she knows this weirdo. Arturia shakes her head, and says she has literally no idea. She seems to be honest, too. Bluebeard insists that she knows him, she must have forgotten or confused his face, but she insists that he's mistaken. Finally, he breaks the Servant rule about saying your name to other Servants or masters (to be fair, hardly any of the servants HAVEN'T done that at this point) and identifies himself by name. Seemingly expecting that to mean something to her.

I'm in Arturia's camp as far as our initial responses to that are concerned, specifically in that they were both "literally who?" With the added detail of me being pretty darned sure that Arturia would have long predated anyone with recognizably French aristocratic name. But, unlike Arturia, I'm also a lazy hack who has access to Wikipedia, so let's metagame this shit.

...well, I think this just got complicated.

Gilles was a knight who fought in the Hundred Years' war. After finishing his military career took up a hugely expensive theater production hobby. He also took up serial killing, particularly of children, to which he confessed when investigated by the Church and was subsequently executed for. He was also rumored to dabble in black magic during his later years, and some details of his murders (along with those of several other notorious killers) are believed to have worked their way into the Bluebeard folk legend. There's been some doubt in modern times as to whether or not he was guilty, but this version of him clearly is.

So, this all maps pretty well to the character we've been presented with. Over-the-top theatrical costume, magician, likes killing children. I'd ask how he could have been executed by muggle authorities if he's supposed to have actually been a Fate-style wizard, but the authorities that dealt with him were the Roman Church, which as we've seen has quite a history of dealing with wizards in this 'verse, so that checks out too. I guess it's just luck that Uwu happened to have procured a little boy for him, as those were his usual victims in life. I'm not sure what's with the giant fake eyeballs, but I've only done about 15 minutes of research so there might well be something to that as well. But, I think the most relevant detail to this scene right now is the fact that Gilles fought alongside Joan d'Arc on several occasions, and at one point was a member of her honorguard. I haven't found anything suggesting he had a thing for her, but it's not that big of a stretch.

So. If this is going where I think it's going, then either Gilles is just deluded enough to think that any blonde fighty lady is Joan, or Fate!Joan was actually a reincarnation or something of Arturia. If it's the latter case, then I wonder what would happen if someone tried to summon Joan as a Grail War servant? Would they end up getting Arturia? Granted, I might just be barking up the wrong tree with the Joan d'Arc connection.

...nope, not barking up the wrong tree! Five seconds later, he calls her "Joan." To her growing confusion. So yeah, either he's just seeing Joan d'Arc in anyone who kinda looks like her, or there's some kind of Thing connecting Arturia with Joan. Anyway, Arturia tells him that she's very sorry, but she's not who he thinks she is. She introduces herself as Arturia Pendragon, Sabre of the fourth Grail War, and indicates that if he isn't here on his master's orders she'd really like to just enjoy the rest of the night with her Austrian love golem.

Gilles falls to his knees, bangs his fists into the pavement, and curses god for driving Joan insane and making her think she's King Arthur.

I can just imagine the salty OKCupid messages this guy would write if he was alive and mortal in modern times.

My brief research also turned up several mentions of Gilles having a short and violent temper that weirded people out long before he was accused of serial killing, so I guess this childish tantrum fits.

She tries to calm him down. He tells her that this Grail War is over, and he's the winner; he was going to make his "master" wish for Joan's resurrection, and now it seems that the Grail has already given itself to him without him even knowing it. Then there's a flash of energy and...okay, it looks like Arturia did that? She summoned her armor, raised Excalibur, and then something sliced a huge crack into the pavement moving away from her and right next to Gilles. I guess she can shoot some kind of sword-beam? I didn't notice her using that in last episode's battle, but those fights were chaotic enough that I easily could have missed it. She tells him to stop disrespecting literally everyone else involved in this Grail War, and also to quit being creepy. Damn, if she hadn't been feeling merciful I think she could have eliminated one of her opponents right then and there; he looked up in surprise after she shot out that beam, and if it had hit him while he wasn't expecting it it's not clear at all that he'd have survived.

He babbles about how she truly is maddened and dead to reason in her current state, but don't worry, he promises he'll defeat God and turn her back into Joan. Then, he teleports away.

Iri and Arturia stare blankly into space in exactly the manner you'd expect, given the everything. Iri murmurs about how helpless it makes you feel when someone just refuses to hear anything you're saying to them. A few cities away, Shiki Ryougi looks up with a start, mystically sensing that there's someone out there who really, truly understands. Arturia says that she should probably just shoot to kill on sight the next time he appears.

However, she's going to have to do something about Diarmuid first. The reason she went with a warning shot this time was because she got the sense that Gilles is more dangerous than he lets on, and she doesn't want to have to fight him until she's got full use of both hands again. So, either find a way to kill Diarmuid, or hope that someone else does soon. A pity, as I'm sure she was hoping he'd stick around the longest.

As she and Iri drive off, a pair of Hassans watch from the treetops. They report back to Kirei that tailing Arturia has borne fruit, and they've gotten an ID on the Caster now too.

They will now try and track Gilles as well, and see if he leads them back to his own master. It's not clear how they plan to do that after he teleported away, but I don't really know anything about how that Servant teleportation ability that everyone except Arturia has works to begin with, so maybe they have a way of tracking it.

Cut to Uwu's murderbasement, where he's crucifying some freshly killed children with metal screws. Yawn. His mood is soured when Gilles beams over and punches the latest decoration into a bloody smear, ruining all that artistic positioning. He screams and wails about how god still refuses to release Joan's soul. Uwu nervously asks if he should be inferring that "Joan" is the girl he was lusting after in the crystal ball, and Gilles "answers" by shouting that they need to commit some bigger atrocities in order to defeat God and free her. My wiki-crawling failed to inform me that Lord Gilles de Rais was such a brilliant logician!

It's time to torture all eleven remaining captives to death right this second, and then go do something even worse. That'll turn Arturia into Joan for sure!

Cut to wherever Archibald is staying, looks like a fancy hotel or something. He's whining at Diarmuid about failing to kill Arturia, and Diarmuid is trying to assure him that yes, he really is taking this grail war seriously, and no, he won't have any hesitation about finishing Arturia or any of the other combatants off. Archibald also reminds him that the two of them made a "pact" for the Grail, which I don't think is how it actually works. Either Archibald did something different from the usual Servant summoning method to get Diarmuid, or he's just being a gaslighting fuck. After he's been bitching at Diarmuid for a while, a woman I don't think we've seen before walks over and tells him to lay off, Lancer did just fine tonight.

Her name is Sola, apparently.

She says that by crippling the Saber, Diarmuid ensured that she can be defeated easily later on. Also, why didn't he come out of hiding and kill the enemy master while the Servants were busy fighting? He doesn't get to bitch at Diarmuid for not giving it his all when he himself wasn't even helping. Fair point.

The music gets very quiet and sinister when Sola is talking, like she's supposed to be a major villain or something. We'll see if she does anything particularly villainous, I suppose.

She reminds Archibald that his variation on the usual Servant contract gives him an advantage, and one that means he can afford to play the waiting game. Aha! So there is a nonstandard summoning arrangement going on here. Hence Archibald talking about he and Diarmuid having a "pact." It's not clear what all the differences are, but one detail she mentions is that she's able to supply extra mana to empower Diarmuid despite not being his master. So, she's sort of a secondary master, or something.

She goes on to tell Archibald what an idiot he is, until Diarmuid interrupts her and says that as a knight, he cannot allow his master to be insulted like that. He notably didn't get upset when Alexander insulted him, but that was funny so his honor permitted it. She stammers, and falls silent, and for a moment the camera zooms in on the little mark under Diarmuid's eye. Guess his hetero charm power is giving him an intimidation bonus against her.

Just then, the fire alarm rings, and Archibald is informed via the hotel phone that there's a fire downstairs in the lobby. He just kind of smirks at that news. He's sure that this is Arturia and her mistress, using arson to clear the hotel before attacking. Arturia's injury can't heal until Diarmuid is dispelled, so an attack this aggressive and this quickly after the altercation has got to be an act of desperation on their part.

I suspect that he's half right; it's Arturia's master, but that isn't the person who he thinks it is. Gray supposedly has a history of doing things like this, after all.

Presumably, he's confident that he and Sola can easily put out or at least avoid the fire as long as the enemies are neutralized.

Also, Archibald has apparently rented an entire floor of this hotel and turned it into a magical death fortress full of portal traps, force field barriers, and angry ghosts looking for living beings to attack. I'm guessing he also made it fireproof, for him to be this confident in it making a difference here. And I assume he's also done something about those giant penthouse windows he's standing in front of to make them unreachable from the outside.

Out in the parking lot, the hotel staff have evacuated all the guests save Archibald and Sola. As they look for them, Gray shows up and hypnotizes the guy taking names into thinking that they're accounted for and marking them as such. He then calls Maiya, and informs her that everyone except the targets are clear. She sets off the controlled demolition.

How they wired that entire building full of explosives in order to cause a perfect, self-contained collapse like that without Archibald noticing, I really am not sure. Using magic to hide their activities from the muggles, sure, but with all that security Archie didn't notice a thing?

Well, even if his magical death fortress is fireproof, it isn't explosion proof, and the penthouse comes down along with the rest of the structure.

Clearing everyone out of the building before destroying it is more merciful than Gray was earlier said to be. Maybe the incident with the airplane was an accident, with a plan having gone awry? Or maybe he's just become less brutal since marrying and having a kid.

Well, if Archibald and Sola really did die in that collapse, then that probably means no more Diarmuid. Oh well.

Gray gives Maiya the order to withdraw and head back home, but the transmission cuts out. On the neighboring balcony where Maiya is standing, we see that she's taking cover from an attacker who appears to have stuck a sword through her comm device. It's Kirei, here to assassinate the assassins.

He muses aloud at how blowing up a building is a surprising tactic, for a wizard, but then he supposes that that's the entire point. Maiya identifies him, which he takes in stride before asking her where he can find Gray.

He throws her dead bat-familiar down on the floor, a clear accusation. She jumps out of hiding and starts shooting. He throws a brace of daggers impossibly fast. The exchange ends with her having taken some cuts, and him unharmed. She uses a smokebomb to cover her escape, and he doesn't make much of a point of pursuing. Instead he simply muses to himself that she doesn't appear to have thrown that bomb, meaning that someone else came to her rescue. Learning about that someone else's existence is useful enough.

Erm...okay? Isn't it possible that she used a spell to do it? Also, if someone else is right here in this building where he was expecting Gray to be, why isn't he assuming that it's Gray? And...like...being on his guard, rather than relaxed, since there's probably another magical assassin right in the same room as him? This bit doesn't make any sense.

Hassan appears then. Kirei reminds him that he's not to show himself outside of the safehouses, but Hassan tells him that this is important. He's found the Caster, and tracked him back to his own home base. He also, we later see Kirei relay to Goatee, seems to be the cause of the many children going missing from nearby towns. Using his magic recklessly to do so. Not even making an attempt to cover his tracks. And the disappearances don't seem to serve any magical purpose that couldn't be served through much easier and more efficient sacrificial rites. Goatee correctly surmises that this is the work of a crazed Servant whose master can't or won't control them.

Notably, Hassan doesn't seem to have caught Gilles de Rais' name after all. I thought that he had. Guess not. Still, they know what the Caster looks like, and they know where his master is based. And, with him serial killing this recklessly and using magic so carelessly to do so, he's not just throwing the Grail War into confusion, but also threatening the masquerade: ie, the number one No No for wizards.

I'm really not seeing how kidnapping a bunch of children is more incriminating than having a multi-Servant faceoff on a public street that leaves the pavement cratered and lightposts cut down like trees. :/

Kirei's dad, who is standing beside him on the sanctuary church end of the line, says that he'll put the word out to all the other masters that the Caster is breaking the laws of the magical world, rather than merely those of the grail war, and that they should all stop what they're doing and eliminate him first. It seems like they should also be getting wizards who aren't involved in the grail war at all to help eliminate him in that case? Maybe? I don't know, not much about this plot point really makes sense.

Kirei gets off the phone, and finds Gilgamesh raiding the sanctuary liquor cabinet. Bad Catholics. Very bad Catholics. Gilgamesh says that the Tohsakas might have a lot of booze, but that Kirei has better booze, so he's here pilfering his instead. On a similar note, he implies that he's starting to regret his contract.

Wait. Contract. So the servants aren't actually being summoned against their will? Or...wait, no, that doesn't make sense...everyone always seems so sure of themselves when they get their hands on an artifact. Why would they be so sure of themselves if for all they know Arturia or Alexander or whoever could just say "lol no" and leave them with a mundane museum piece and no Servant? I'm confused.

Anyway, Gilgamesh says that Goatee was polite and respectful enough during his summons, and the potential for glory that he promised great enough, that he saw fit to respond. But he never expected Goatee to be so relentlessly boring.

And, well...speaking from the audience, I can't really bring myself to disagree with Gilgamesh's assessment. Goatee seems to invest a lot in seeming like this suave, mysterious wizard, but when he's not putting on that persona he really is pretty bland. Same goes for Kirei, to a lesser degree. He and Goatee have basically just been the "narrators" that frame the other subplots, several of which are more interesting and entertaining. Goatee has almost nothing to him besides "wants power."

And...these last few minutes of the episode consists of a dialogue between Kirei and Gilgamesh that's borderline incomprehensible. Think Garden of Fate style empty philosophizing and chained non sequiturs. There are also a few bits that feel like they're badly translated in the same way that Garden of Sinners was.

For instance, there's one moment where, when talking about how Goatee is a very traditional wizard with traditional wizard interests, Kirei describes him as "ultra right-wing." In context, I'm pretty sure that this was supposed to be "very conservative" in a non-political sense, but well...if something like that got through, and the rest of the conversation is full of what sounds like nonsense, then it stands to reason that there are other translation gaffs whose original meaning aren't obvious. So, I'll try as best I can, but no promises as to how accurately I'm representing the intent of the text.

Goatee wants the Holy Grail so that he can get at the "root" of reality. Presumably, so he and his buddies in Rome can do something with it, but it sounds like Goatee himself mostly just wants to see it for science and he'll be leaving the actual wish to the priests. Gilgamesh claims to not be interested in abstract existential questions, being concerned only with tangible things he can touch, enjoy, and dominate. Also, he wants to know what Kirei wants; even if he isn't planning to win the Grail for himself, he's at least dedicating a lot to helping someone else get in, so there must be something in it for him. Kirei responds that it's just his sense of duty, but Gilgamesh doesn't buy it. World-reshaping power at his fingertips, and all he can think of is duty?

He tries rephrasing his question, and asks Kirei what would give him joy. Kirei says that nothing does, and also joy is sinful. Is he just pulling Gilgamesh's leg by giving him the cliched parody Catholic answer to that question? Because, like, "joy is a sin" is the punchline of every joke about Catholicism that doesn't involve pedophilia, but it's not what any real Catholic would tell you. Gilgamesh tells him that that's stupid (it's literally a joke, so, well, yes) and advises Kirei to try...people watching. It's something he does for fun sometimes that Kirei probably won't find sinful, he's already monitoring the other Masters so it won't be a distraction, and maybe by trying to divine the others' reasons for pursuing the Grail Kirei can help figure out what really drives himself as well. Gilgamesh then leaves, and Kirei thinks about how he was trying to puzzle out Gray back in episode two.

This scene's framing and direction feels like it's supposed to be sinister, but so far Kirei's behavior has been less objectionable than most of the other masters', and Gilgamesh has come across as sort of a loud mouthed buffoon. So yeah, not really feeling it. End episode.

Watching Archie and Co's hotel collapse around them was amusing, though if they were actually dead we'd have seen the bodies, and Sola's introduction to the story would be meaningless in that case, so I'm sure at least one of them lived. Arturia and Iri continue to be a treat, and Gilles is a more interesting baddy now that the main focus is on his (imagined or otherwise) relationships rather than his edginess.

That said, more and more details seem to be contradicting themselves, and I'm not sure how much of it is translation issues. Some of the specifics of the Church's role in the grail wars, and the extent of the local occult underground that isn't directly involved in the war, are either conspicuous by their absence or not standing up to the narrative's pressure. And, that last scene with Gilgamesh and Kirei was just incomprehensible.

All in all, it's a bit weaker than the last couple of episodes, though still for the most part entertaining and enjoyable.