Fate/Zero E2: False Start

Hopefully an ironic title.

The pilot ended with everyone summoning their enslaved ghost, and this one picks up with Waver using his to rob a library. The spirit in question, a hulking, red-bearded "Rider" type, was able to phase through the walls to get inside, but had to be solid in order to carry the stolen book out again, which necessitated punching his way through a metal window shutter. Much to Waver's frustration.

His Rider also seems to be against stealing in principle. However, he defines stealing as "sneaking away like a coward with what you've looted, instead of triumphantly marching it away from the site of your latest conquest." He's fine with using stealth to win the battle, but looting is an exclusively post-victory activity for an honorable warrior.

Wonder where and when he's from? The red hair and furs make me think Viking, but the ethos sounds more ancient near east (Vikings were famous for their hit-and-run raids, after all, and used stealth both ways). Cyrus the Great was said to be a redhead, I believe. Could this be him, or perhaps another of his dynasty? Also he was wearing sandals, and he's a "Rider." Vikings favored boots, and while they did ride horses when traveling overland they aren't exactly famous for it.

We got a very brief look at the style of his armor under that cloak, but it was too dark to make out the detailing. Looked like it could have been Greek or Persian though. I'll assume Persian for now.

Waver whines and stomps his foot at this some more, and Rider just shrugs and tells him "okay, carry them away yourself then" and hands him the books before vanishing. Waver takes this in stride, expressing more emotional maturity and self awareness than I've come to expect from him.

Sorry, typo. I meant to say that he cries about it and wallows in self pity at having to carry some books, while blaming everyone else for him having stolen the artifact, escaped with it to Japan, summoned Rider, and given him this set of orders.

Can someone please just kill this fucking kid already?

Roll OP. It's a pretty good one. Not JJBA or FMA:B level, but good. There's too many characters doing too many things for me to try and break it down just yet, but I have a few more episodes of this in queue so I'll probably give it a try at some point once I've gotten a better handle on who everyone is. Two things that did catch my notice are a glimpse of what looks like the same Lancer who showed up again in the following grail war in SN/UWB, and a giant column of golden light searing its way into the sky from the middle of Fyuki city that I suspect may be the holy grail being used. Does somebody actually get their wish, at the end of this show? The world looks pretty un-transformed by the time of the next show. Maybe Waver somehow manages to win and just wishes for a private cave full of Playboy models or some stupid shit.

The Rider reappears once Waver has put enough distance between himself and the ransacked library for the dishonorable part to be over with. And, it turns out that it wasn't actually Waver who wanted these books at all, it was Rider. He wants some maps, both local and global, so that he can plan their upcoming battles. They're just travel books, atlases, and road maps. Which Waver could have easily just bought. Not sure if he just didn't bother suggesting that, or if Rider thinks that commerce is dishonorable too.

When asked to point out where the lands he once ruled are on the world map, and Waver does so, we get a surprisingly nuanced moment from Rider. So small. During his life, he had thought his empire world-spanning, but really he had just bitten off a little chunk of west Asia and eastern Europe. Seeing how far he is from that territory, and how much bigger the world actually is, he's humbled, and laughs at his own previous arrogance. He also let's slip that his original homeland was in Macedonia.

Um. Okay, then. Very odd artistic choice for Alexander the Great. Every painting and statue that's ever been made of him, both during his lifetime and afterward, had him as unusually slim and slight for a warrior, and written accounts corroborate this. He's also almost always depicted as clean-shaven. There is a minor historical controversy over him having possibly been a redhead, so at least there's that, but otherwise...

It's possible that all those depictions are propagandized versions of him to better conform to Greco-Macedonian ideals of male perfection, of course, but it still seems weird to me that Fate would go so far in the opposite direction.

Anyway, now that he's been called back into the mortal world, Alexander wishes to pick up where he left off.

They'll raise an army here in Japan, and conquer their way back west across Asia until reaching Macedonia, where Alexander will reestablish his old seat of power and then retake the rest of his Mediterranean holdings as well.

...

I'm sorry, I know this isn't the story we're getting, or that I'd be expecting from Fate/Zero's premise, but...god, I would watch the hell out of that.

...

Waver finally puts his foot down, and tells Alexander that that's NOT what he's summoned him for. There's a grail war on, and he's going to fight for Waver in it. Alexander grudgingly accedes, and asks Waver what he plans to wish for should he win. Waver tells him that that's none of his business (um...), until Alexandr clarifies that the reason he asks is because if the answer is "world domination," Waver had damned well better make sure it's Alexander who gets the credit for it.

Waver relents, and tells him that he's going to wish for everyone to treat him fairly, because he's tired of not getting any respect.

And then, with a single swing of his arm, Alexander becomes my favorite character in this franchise.

Is there a gif that's just this over and over again? Someone please give me that gif.

The verbal diss that Alexander gives him after this kinda subtracts from it, since at one point he denounces Waver for wanting something so petty as to be revered (kiiiiiinda hypocritical coming from Alexander the Great), but other than that it's astute and well earned. Waver complaining about no one respecting him, after watching him treat virtually every single other person he interacts with as an object to be used and abused at his whim with narry a thought, is just that aggravating.

He considers using one of his three Command Seals to bring Alexander to heel, but realizes he doesn't actually have an order to give him at the moment aside from "don't be mean to me," and that might not be the best use of his very limited command stockpile. Instead, he just tells Alexander that he can go do whatever he wants after he's won him the grail (I don't think Servants can stick around after that point, but Alex might not know that), and they can both get what they want no matter how stupid the other thinks it is by working together. Alexander grudgingly agrees, and when asked for a demonstration of his power he calls down a thunderbolt that craters the pavement and leaves the Chariot of Gordius on it, complete with a pair of bulls in elaborate barding to pull it.

According to legend, there was a thunderstorm that lasted all day and night over Gordium after Alexander cut the knot binding this chariot, which was taken as an omen of Zeus' approval of Alexander's methods and ambitions. The chariot being hitched to bulls rather than horses is a new one, but since bulls are often associated with Zeus I think it works. Alexander also confirms that his association with the Gordian chariot and the ropes that bound it is probably what made him appear as the Rider as opposed to being a Lancer or Sabre.

This raises some intriguing questions. If the more fanciful aspects of Alexander's story are supposed to have literally taken place, then is Fate an "all myths are true" kind of setting? Are Zeus and the other Olympians actually out there in the spirit world, along with the Aesir, the Innead, the Kami, and all other gods and demons from throughout world mythology? Or is this more of a Sandman type thing, where legends and superstitions take on a life of their own, and these "heroic spirits" aren't actually the ghosts of historical figures but rather magical entities formed from the legends surrounding them? The latter seems unlikely, given how different this Alexander is from the popular depiction. Let alone King Arthur (though in her case, the Einzberns may have just gotten the wrong scabbard and summoned Hildr or somebody by mistake). I guess the former is more likely.

Anyway, Alexander tells Waver to find him some other Servants to kill, and he'll kill them for him and get him the grail. For now, he's just going to keep catching up on the last two millennia of world history.

Cut to Germany, where Gray is taking his and Iri's daughter Ilya for a walk in the perpetual winter of Einzburg. I'm guessing he'll be departing for Japan within the day or so, and wants to spend a little time with his daughter before that happens.

Meanwhile, Iri and the ghost of the woman who may or may not be at the root of the King Arthur legend watch from a window high up in the castle. Hmm, I wonder. Maybe that scabbard IS Excalibur's, but rather than summoning Arthur they got the Lady of the Lake who first gave it to him? That would actually make a lot of sense. The Lady isn't usually thought of as human, but I can't rule out the possibility of non-human Servants until we know what exactly is up with that fossilized snakeskin, so.

The Sabre is surprised to see Gray playing so sweetly with his daughter. That's not the kind of man she took him for, especially after how he apparently reacted to her own appearance during the summoning. Iri points out that he did have good reason to be surprised, if nothing else, and the spirit says that hey, it's not HER fault none of the Saxon kings would take her seriously unless she pretended to be male. Holy shit she actually IS Queen Arturia! This is so many worlds away from what you normally expect from anime goddamn!

There seems to be more to Gray's reaction to Arturia than just sexism, though. Apparently, he was expecting King Arthur to be this paragon of virtue and forthrightness, and learning that she had been capable of such an elaborate and longterm deception was a major blow to him. Pretty rich coming from the guy who had just gone off at length about how Servants are just tools and who they were in life doesn't matter besides the powers they retain from that. He also apparently judges her for letting her political handlers weaponize her for the purpose of unifying England like that...despite that having been part of the original King Arthur story all along. This just sounds like massive projection coming from Gray, given how he's letting the Einzberns string him along.

That's a recurring thing in this show. A lot of these characters are in denial about their own flaws, and most of them project those flaws onto anyone within range.

Back outside in the perpetual snow, Gray tells Ilya that he'll be back from Japan in about two weeks. A bit overconfident there, Gray. He also says that her mother, who will be leaving with him, isn't going to be back for much longer than that. Also, she wants Ilya to remember that she'll always be with her, even if she can't see or touch her.

-_-

Back in the prologue scene of the pilot, when Ilya had just been born, Iri and Gray were talking about how Iri would get killed because of him. I assumed that they meant that the grail war is a dangerous business, and that him fighting in it would neccessarily endanger his close family as well, but now it seems like they're planning for Iri, specifically, to not survive even if Gray does.

Do they have some kind of sacrificial thing planned? If so, why would Gray be going along with this, if indeed he's in this for his love for Iri as was heavily hinted at? Yeah, there's something else going on. Maybe Iri's lifespan was already limited by a curse or a prophecy or some such, and they're planning their grail war strategy around that? I'll have to watch further before making any more educated guesses than that.

Gray seems like he's about to tell Ilya the truth, for a moment, but then decides not to and just hugs her as the snow surrounds them.

And now, for something completely different! Cut to a new character, who is performing some kind of ritual dance with a spellbook and not seeming to take it all that seriously while also watching news coverage of some of the latest occult murders. Turns out, he's responsible for at least several of them, and he has a kindergarten-aged boy bound and gagged and being forced to watch the coverage with him while he prances around and does occult stuff.

The press is calling the culprit behind this particular subsection of Fyuki's bizarre murder epidemic "the Demon," which amuses him. Especially since he dug up some family heirlooms that suggest that his ancestors may have once tried summoning demons.

He's made a summoning circle from the blood of his last three victims (hahaha he could have just used roosters) and captured the kid as an offering for whatever shows up, assuming anything does. He doesn't actually know that demons eat children, nor has he heard it from any reputable source, but he just kind of assumes it. He's utterly mystified (and excited) when the Master marks appear on his hand during the ritual, making it clear that this guy is just a muggle serial killer who has absolutely no idea what he's doing and didn't even know for sure that magic actually existed until just now.

Oh boy. Guess Goatee and Kirei Senior weren't fucking when they said that last-minute third party grail contenders tend to be both monstrous and pathetic.

Well, Uwu does the thing, and is shocked when a "demon" actually does appear in the summoning circle. It's more humanlike than he expected though, aside from the giant glass eyes that make it look like some sort of owl-person and that it seems able to actually see through. Uwu also isn't sure why the hell it's blathering about the Holy Grail, what the fuck even is this shit he just wanted to watch a demon eat a kid!

This servant identifies itself as a "Caster." Even the spirits of wizards themselves aren't safe from the grail's recruitment, it would seem! He furthermore hints that he'd been after the grail himself in life, and that he's pleased to have been given a second shot at it (Uwu still has no idea what he's talking about, of course). So, either this guy died within the last 200 years since the grail wars started, or he's an earlier wizard who tried and failed to summon the grail before the Makiris, Tohsakas, and Einzberns pooled their resources and succeeded.

Then, he pulls out a spellbook of his own, opens to a certain page, and says:

So. Um. Apparently it isn't just all myths that are true in this setting. It's all myths and early twentieth century pulp scifi stories as well! Does this mean someone else could get Conan? Or John Carter? How about Tarzan? Oh my god yes please tell me that's a thing in Fate that would be fucking hilarious and even if it isn't I don't care I'm never taking anything in this franchise seriously ever again hahahahaha!

Anyway.

Uwu is outright dismayed when the Caster not only fails to devour the child he went out of his way to provide for it, but actually lets the kid go. However, he's not about to try to get in the way of what he believes to be an honest-to-god demon when he has no idea how to actually control it (he pointedly has no idea what that mark that appeared on his hand is for). The kid, still half-paralyzed by fear, creeps out of the room and toward the front door. He's just about to put his hand on the handle and seems to be gearing up to make a break for it when a mass of tentacles grabs him from behind and pulls him offscreen.

The screams persist long enough and erratically enough to communicate that this isn't a quick or painless death, though they do go quiet eventually. Meanwhile, the Caster explains that he draws his power from fear, and that the most potent fear of all is generated by, um...

I've never heard that one before, Urobochi. You really are just an endless fountain of brand new ideas, aren't you? :/

Anyway, Uwu's dismay turns to delight, and he begs the Lovecraft-plagiarizing Caster to teach him new ways of committing sadistic murder and how to empower himself using fear. Especially if they can use children and/or teenaged girls, those are his favorites. The Caster easily assumes the dominant position between the two, since Uwu doesn't know there's any way he can change that. When asked for his name, the Caster says that in this era, he'd probably best be known as Bluebeard.

Bluebeard, from the gruesome fairy tail? Wasn't he supposed to have, well...a blue beard?

Maybe Alexander stole his beard and dyed it red for personal use. Yeah, I'm going with that.

Cut to Kirei, standing on a highway overpass at the edge of the city. He's just gotten word from Rome about the seventh Servant having been summoned, so it's game on! He calls Hassan the Assassin to his side and gives him his first mission of the war.

Erm...wait. Wasn't Hassan Goatee's servant? I could have sworn Goatee was the one ordering him around and coordinating the Tohsaka house's defenses with him before. And that the fossilized snakeskin was going to be used to summon Kirei's servant.

The heck?

Kirei orders Hassan to kill Goatee, opening this battle with a massive backstab. What. The. Huh? I could have absolutely SWORN that Hassan was Goatee's servant! Hassan is surprised by this order, as he too had been under the impression that Kirei and Goatee were conspiring together, but Kirei tells him to go ahead and do it. He should have no trouble with the Tohsaka house's other defenses, and he doesn't need to worry about Goatee's own Archer either. Hassan is skeptical of that last bit, but Kirei is completely confident that the Archer is out of the picture. So, Hassan goes off to conduct his first assassination of this summoning.

The fuck?

Well, the Tohsakas' affinity for Archers seems to be a recurring thing now. But...the fuck?

Hassan speeds down the hillside and onto the Tohsakas' property. He evades a series of anti-ghost forcefields being projected from a magic crystal concealed in a modern art piece on the lawn, and is about to penetrate into the house itself when he's impaled by a rain of arrows from the second story window. Hassan is pinned to the ground, bleeding, as the Archer (not the same one Rin gets later, it turns out) triumphantly shit-talks him from his perch up above.

Oh. Right. "False start." The title of the episode.

This is some kind of tactical simulation that Goatee is running. That's why he and Kirei's servants are mixed up, among other incongruous details. Gotcha. Well, that's the end of "False Start."


An interesting and enlightening episode all around. The Servants are getting the screentime to come into their own as characters now, and they're more interesting and likeable than their summoners almost to a one (okay, that wouldn't be true of Bluebeard if he'd been summoned by anyone other than Uwu, but he was). The complexity isn't letting up, what with these new layers of conspiracy that the Einzbern subplot introduces and yet another moving part in the form of Uwu/Bluebeard showing up, but I had a much easier time following this than the previous episode. As I expected, the show is following the Game of Thrones mold by introducing (almost) everyone in the pilot, but then coming back to only a few of them in each subsequent episode. No sign of the Matous in this one, and barely anything about the Tohsakas and Kirei (and that may not even count, since that ending scene is most likely simulated).

God, that Cthulhu thing was dumb though.